A Change In Plans for Thanksgiving

My mom sent me this. I laughed. Thought I'd share.

Martha Stewart will not be dining with us this Thanksgiving. I'm telling you in advance, so don't act surprised. Since Ms. Stewart won't be coming, I've made a few small changes:

Our sidewalk will not be lined with homemade, paper bag luminaries. After a trial run, it was decided that no matter how cleverly done, rows of flaming lunch sacks do not have the desired welcoming effect.

The dining table will not be covered with expensive linens, fancy china or crystal goblets. If possible, we will use dishes that match and everyone will get a fork. Since this IS Thanksgiving, we will refrain from using the plastic Peter Rabbit plate and the Santa napkins from last Christmas.

Our centerpiece will not be the tower of fresh fruit and flowers that I promised. Instead we will be displaying a hedgehog-like decoration hand-crafted from the finest construction paper. The artist assures me it is a turkey.

We will be dining fashionably late. The children will entertain you while you wait. I'm sure they will be happy to share every choice comment I have made regarding Thanksgiving, pilgrims and the turkey hotline. Please remember that most of these comments were made at 5:00 AM upon discovering that the turkey was still hard enough to cut diamonds. As accompaniment to the children's recital, I will play a recording of tribal drumming. If the children should mention that I don't own a recording of tribal drumming, or that tribal drumming sounds suspiciously like a frozen turkey in a clothes dryer, ignore them. They are lying.

We toyed with the idea of ringing a dainty silver bell to announce the start of our feast. In the end, we chose to keep our traditional method. We've also decided against a formal seating arrangement.

When the smoke alarm sounds, please gather around the table and sit where you like. In the spirit of harmony, we will ask the children to sit at a separate table. In a separate room. Next door.

Now I know you have all seen pictures of one person carving a turkey in front of a crowd of appreciative onlookers. This will not be happening at our dinner. For safety reasons, the turkey will be carved in a private ceremony. I stress "private" meaning: Do not, under any circumstances, enter the kitchen to laugh at me. Do not send small, unsuspecting children to check on my progress. I have an electric knife. The turkey is unarmed. It stands to reason that I will eventually win. When I do, we will eat.

Before I forget, there is one last change. Instead of offering a choice between 12 different scrumptious desserts, we will be serving the traditional pumpkin pie, garnished with whipped cream and small fingerprints. You will still have a choice: take it or leave it.

Martha Stewart will not be dining with us this Thanksgiving. She probably won't come next year either.

I am thankful.

Friday Fill-Ins 11/20/09

1. We need to start a petition to get "The Christmas Shoes" banned from the airwaves.

2. I watched last night's episode of "30 Rock" today and it made me smile. Heck, it made me snort and guffaw as well.

3. If you want to know what I think of the whole Twilight saga, have a seat. You'll be here awhile (I'm not a fan).

4. I need redemption that only comes through Jesus Christ because I am a sinful creature.

5. Massachusetts has a proposed 5% sales tax on elective cosmetic surgery; I think it should be higher, and it should be adopted nationwide.

6. Pajamas, the Macy's parade, my sister visiting and a leftover turkey sandwich make for a happy holiday.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to going to bed. Tomorrow my plans include helping the boys and Camryn straighten their rooms (I think I put something to that effect every week!), then keeping the babies in the nursery at church and Sunday, I want to maybe finish decorating the trees and have some hot tub time with the fam!

Friday Fill Ins 11/13/09

Happy Friday the 13th!

And here we go!

1. The last band I saw live was the Eagles. Awesome. Completely awesome. The last concert I went to was Taylor Swift, but technically, she's a singular artist performing with a band, so I didn't count her.

2. What I look forward to most on Thanksgiving is staying in my PJs for as long as possible, watching the Macy's parade, eating dressing and cranberry sauce (the kind from the can is the best!) and having leftover turkey sandwiches on white bread (with mayo!)

3. My Christmas/holiday shopping is not done. It's started, but usually by this time I've gotten it all done. I'm way behind this year. I'm planning on doing most of the shopping online, so that'll help. I honestly wish I could press the pause button on Christmas for about 2 weeks. Not ready. Not ready at all!

4. Thoughts of how loud this stupid RC car that Quinn got for his birthday is fill my head. I don't think my mother-in-law thinks about us having to listen to this stuff when she buys these loud toys for the children (or, maybe she does, and she buys them with a smirk on her face. Who knows!) This one has obnoxious lights and loud music, and it's not helping my headache one bit.

5. I wish I could wear pajamas all day long, no matter where I go. Pajamas are the best.

6. Bagpipes remind me of my father-in-law's funeral. Someone played "Amazing Grace" on the bagpipes at his funeral. It was a cold January day and whenever I hear bagpipes, I get a chill and think of that cold, sad day.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to just sitting here and hoping this headache goes away. I also want to watch the episode of "Private Practice" I missed last night. Tomorrow my plans include helping the boys straighten their room, plus cleaning up my own office. It's a mess (I haven't been in there much at all this week! Busy, busy!) Sunday, I want to do some work on getting my office moved upstairs. It's driving me nuts that it hasn't been done yet.

Farm Livin' is the Life for Me!

Today I was straightening the playroom with Quinn and Lillian. Every time I help clean the playroom, my posterior region gets sore (it's all the bending over). Who knew cleaning the playroom would give you such a glute workout?

The last thing we did today was put together all the puzzles whose pieces had decided to scatter themselves about the room. When we were done, I stood up. I felt the butt workout when I did that.

Using my best deep Southern drawl I said, "I do believe mah boo-tay hurts. Oh, yes, my boo-tay hurts!"

Quinn said, "I know some people who talk like that!"

"Really? Who do you know who talks like that?"

At the same time, Quinn and Lillian yelled, "EMMA!"

I chuckled when Emma's name was mentioned, because they were right. Emma is the cutest little redhead you ever will meet. I love her and her sweet momma. They both have very cute Southern accents. Emma doesn't know it, but she's going to marry my Quinn one day (she's in his class).

That's another story for another day, though.

You know the reason Emma talks like that (according to Quinn)?

Because she lives on a farm.

HA!

Saturday Morning: A Play in 3 Acts

Scene One: 6:30 am, a darkened bedroom where a male and a female are blissfully sleeping. A 6 year-old boy enters the room. The 6 year-old boy (Quinn) bounces up onto the bed and squirms his way between the sleeping man and sleeping woman. He plops himself down right in between them. The man pulls the little boy to his side of the bed and rolls over to snuggle the boy. The woman rises and uses the bathroom. Upon her return to the bed she finds the boy in the spot where she was previously sleeping. She nudges him to the middle of the bed, climbs in and embraces the boy. Sleeping continues.

Scene Two: 6:45 am, a darkened bedroom where a male, a female, and a 6 year-old boy are blissfully sleeping. Heavy footsteps are heard pounding their way down a hardwood-lined hallway towards the darkened bedroom. The woman hears the footsteps and awakens in time to see an 8 year-old boy approach the foot of the bed. The woman snaps her fingers.

Woman: (whispered) Aiden! Come to this side of the bed. (turns to the 6 year-old and whispers) Quinn. Move over. Aiden's here.

The 8 year-old boy climbs into bed on the left side of the mother. She rolls over to hug him.

Aiden: (whispered) I thought Quinn went to the bathroom, so I waited and waited but he didn't come back. I remembered last night he said he wanted to come snuggle you this morning, so I came in here to find him.

Woman: He's been in here since 6:30. Try to go back to sleep.

Act three: 7:00 am. The 6 year-old boy whispers to the woman that he is returning to his bed. The 8 year-old cannot sleep. The woman hears him giggle a little.

Woman: (whispered) What's funny?

Aiden: (whispered) I was laying here thinking about Soarin' (the ride at Disney World). That made me think about Bee Movie, and I remembered the guy that does the video before you get on Soarin' (Patrick Warburton). He also does the voice for the boyfriend in Bee Movie, which is a Dreamworks film. But, he also does a voice in the Emperor's New Groove, which is a Disney movie. So, that guy works for two different movie companies. Funny.

Woman: (whispered): I love how your mind works, son.

Curtain.

Commentary: Seriously? This is what my 8 year-old son is thinking at 7 o'clock in the morning? Patrick Warburton working for two different movie companies? I really DO love how his mind works!

1-800-222-2222

There's a third time for everything.

Today I had to call poison control for the 3rd time.

Know why?

Quinn and Lillian were playing in the yard. Quinn's voice came over the walkie talkie.

"Mommy? We found some berries in the woods and K. (the neighbor child) says they're not poisonous. Can we eat them?"

I grabbed my walkie talkie and practically screamed into it. "NO NO NO NO NO NO! K. does NOT know what berries are poisonous and which ones aren't! She's only FIVE! DO NOT EAT THE BERRIES! DO NOT EAT THE BERRIES!"

I heard Lillian say in the background, "Quinn already ate one!"

Aw, man.

I told them to bring the berries inside. I lectured all 3 of the kids about eating things without adult permission, and then I sent K. home.

I jumped on the internet and Googled "South Carolina berries red stems". I found out that the plant the berries Quinn ate (which looked a lot like blueberries, except blueberries aren't in season) were possibly Pokeweed Fruit and they are poisonous. A tingle started in my cheeks and went down my spine. Lillian took Camryn back outside and showed her the plant, and then Camryn cut off a stem and brought it back in to me. Pokeweed was indeed the culprit.

Aw, man.

I picked up the phone and called 1-800-222-2222. Poison Control.

Worst case scenario from eating one berry: a touch of the runs.

This, in case you didn't know, is a Pokeweed plant:

I guarantee you that my kids won't ever go near one again.

Bless their hearts.

Friday Fill-Ins 10/16/09

I'm blogging two days in a row. Don't pass out. I know. It's hard to imagine. Breathe deeply. We'll get through it together.

1. So are we going to Disney World in 12 days? Well, I don't know about you, but we are! We've been counting down since around day 170, and our paper chain made from scrapbooking paper scraps has gotten shorter and shorter. Can't believe how fast time has flown.

2. Disney prep is what's up ahead. Gotta make sure the kids get all their school work done (the work they're gonna miss), gotta make packing lists and then pack. Lots to do!

3. I love to be productive. I feel so lazy when I don't do anything all day long. Today has been a good day. I crossed one thing off my list of 4 things to do (don't laugh... all 4 things are big things! I can't do them all in one day!)

4. Last night I was craving chocolate of some sort. I ended up with a sugar free chocolate pudding cup, but I wanted ice cream, like, reallllllllllly bad. Today after I took the kids for haircuts we went to Bruster's and I had a scoop of chocolate almond coconut. It's like Almond Joy ice cream. So yummy.

5. I walk a lot when we go to Disney, and I don't mind it at all, because there is a reason for walking (getting to rides!) I wish I could motivate myself to take walks at home.

6. Knowing that God loves me unconditionally is the true elixir of life!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to sitting in the hot tub with my family. The weather is perfect for it! Tomorrow my plans include getting the playroom cleaned up so we can split it into a playroom/office (Quinn wants his room back, and my office is currently in his bedroom). Sunday, I want to get as much of my office moved upstairs as we can before I get too exhausted. It's going to be a big job.

Just Now...

...when I submitted the previous blog post, ads with the following headlines appeared on the right side of my computer screen:

Sympathy Gifts Sympathy Gifts and Flowers. Same Day Delivery Available. 1800flowers.com

Be a Grief Counselor Advance your career - earn a degree in Counseling completely online. www.newdegrees.info

Cheap Bereavement Flights Looking for Bereavement Travel? Find Cheap Rates Here. Save BIG! www.Tripmama.com/Bereavement

Newspaper Obits

Today

....is actually Thursday. It's not Friday. Just in case you were like me and mistook today for Friday just about all day long.

I got my roots touched up and got a haircut today. Thanks for noticing.

It's rained for 3 days straight. And it's cold. Like, turn on the gas logs, simmer a pot of chili in the Crock Pot all day kind of cold. C-O-L-D. Not ready for it to smack me in the face like this. I need a gradual progression into cooler weather. Not the 80 degrees over the weekend, freeze your feet off on the cold tile floor on Monday morning kind of shock to the system. What the heck? Yeah, Al. Global Warming is real. Not made up at all.

Camryn and Aiden participated in an Egyptian burial ceremony. Didn't know they were Egyptian? Didn't know there was a death? Wasn't contacted about making a casserole for the family of the deceased? 'Sokay. It was all part of their history lessons at school. It was cool, from what I hear. I wasn't there. (I was getting the roots and haircut taken care of at the time of the burial. I sent online condolences.)

Camryn played the part of Isis during the ceremony. As part of her costume, she wore mascara and the moms who helped applied black eyeliner to her eyes. She wiped off the eyeliner, but she was still wearing mascara and lip gloss when I saw her this afternoon. Amazing what a little bit of mascara does to her eyes. Now she's begging to start wearing mascara every day because she got so many compliments on it. Not sure how I feel about that. She's eleven.

Since today is Thursday (not FRIDAY, remember?!?) I'm going to head into the den in a minute to watch the season premiere of 30 Rock. Oh, Liz Lemon. How I've missed you and your dorky minions. Kidney Now!

Enjoy your weekend.

Nouns, verbs, prepositional phrases... oh my!

One day last week Stan sent Aiden to the shower. A few minutes later he went in to check on Aiden's bathing progress (you gotta check on him... he likes to get things done fast. Not well... just FAST, like he's constantly competing with an unseen force.)

So Stan opens the curtain and sees Aiden leaning up against the shower wall, arm raised, head resting on his forearm. Naturally, Aiden is startled, but recovers.

Stan says, "Whatcha doin', Aiden?"

His response?

"Ah, Daddy! I was classifying a sentence!"

Aiden's brain is a sponge. Once something gets stuck in there, it doesn't come out. He probably can't read without diagramming sentences, either.

Friday Fill Ins 9/25/09

1. One week ago it was September 18th. I was looking forward to date night with my husband.

2. I felt very loved and secure when I was young.

3. Mama told me I'd have a child just like me one day. Oh, how right she was. Thanks, Mom. ; )

4. Just between you and me, I think some people need to keep their noses on their own faces.

5. Take your time is always good advice. Anything worth doing is worth doing well.

6. This, too, will pass! And then I'll probably look back and think it wasn't so bad after all. That could probably be said about most of life's little bumps.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to a nice, quiet Friday night at home with my family. Tomorrow my plans include cleaning up the playroom, then church and Sunday, I want to hang out with my family!

And the hits keep on coming...

Lillian's on a comedic roll lately.

Last night at dinner she said, "Hola, Daddy! I want you to sit by me! Do you know what I just said to you, Daddy? I said, 'Hello, Daddy! I want you to sit by me!'"

Yesterday afternoon she was singing a song called "Mighty to Save". We sing it in church. The lyrics go:

Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.

Lillian's version?

Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty insane,
He is Mighty insane..

Stolen From Facebook

I've been a bad, bad blogger. I'm sorry. Life is happening fast here. I wish I had more time to write, but I don't. I'm throwing you a Stolen From Facebook bone today. Here you go:

1. What was the last thing you put in your mouth? Chicken Minis from Chick Fil A. I had to eat something before I went to the dentist this morning, because that stupid, tastes like ear wax sedative he shoots into my gums before a filling makes me shaky and woozy if I don't eat.

2. Where was your profile picture taken? My Facebook profile picture is my 4 kiddos at the zoo in July. It would've been a much better picture if Aiden had smiled. He hates having his picture made. He usually hides, but he couldn't escape the camera that day, so he just frowned.

4. Name someone who made you laugh today? Can't say that I've had a laugh yet today. I'm sure that'll change as soon as I pick the kids up from school. Someone always says something funny in the car.

5. How late did you stay up last night and why? I think I was asleep before they announced the last Emmy category last night. Glad to hear "Mad Men" won, though. I love that show.

6. If you could move somewhere else, would you? Gulf Shores, Alabama. I'd love to see the ocean every day.

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks? Probably... we always see fireworks @ Disney World, and I usually feel so happy to be there that I would be likely to kiss someone.... one of my children or my husband.

8. Which of your friends lives closest to you on facebook? My husband and my daughter.

9. Do you believe exes can be friends? Probably, but it's awkward.

10. How do you feel about Dr Pepper? Meh. It makes me burp worse than any other soft drink. I don't usually drink Dr. Pepper or any soda for that matter.

11. When was the last time you cried really hard? Hmmm.... when we thought our cat, Beeson, was having a stroke and that it was quite possibly his last day on earth. Turned out to be a seizure, and thankfully he hasn't had another.

12. Who took your profile picture? Me.

13. Who was the last person you took a picture of? Our guests @ Lillian's birthday party yesterday.

14. Was yesterday better than today? Yes. It was a Sunday. I slept late (one of the benefits of going to church on Saturday nights!). We went to Golden Corral for breakfast (Lillian's choice for her birthday), then we had her party and church community group. Today I had 2 fillings filled @ the dentist. Yesterday wins hands down.

15. Can you live a day without TV? Funny, because our satellite is down right now so I'm sort of forced to live without it until either the weather clears or the repairman comes on Wednesday, whichever happens first. I'm happy some things are viewable online.

16. Are you upset about anything? Currently? No. I've had some stressful moments in the past couple of weeks, but nothing monumental.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it? Yes.

18. Are you a bad influence? I don't think so. You know something I don't?

19. Night out or night in? Really depends on several factors. Is it raining? Then definitely in. Good concert or movie? Out. I like going out, but I probably stay in more than I go out. I'm usually beat by the end of the day.

20. What items could you not go without during the day? My computer and my car.

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? I honestly cannot remember.

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say? I don't text, so there shouldn't be anything in my inbox.

23. How do you feel about your life right now? Content.

24. Do you hate anyone? Extremely dislike, yes, but hate, no. That's a very strong term.

25. If we were to look in your facebook inbox, what would we find? a message from a friend telling me that the lady in front of her in line is tweezing her eyebrows (this friend and I both have issues with stray hairs. I keep tweezers in the car so I can pluck my brows in carpool line. I know... sick.), a message containing an important phone number and another message containing important addresses.

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass? Yes.

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before? I'm pretty sure the answer is no.

28. What song is stuck in your head? I don't think there's anything stuck there now 'cause the iPod is playing and it's hard to have a song stuck in your head when you're hearing other music.

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m., who do you want it to be? I was going to say Ed McMahon (with his big, fat Publisher's Clearing House check) and then I remembered that Ed is dead. I don't think I want to see Ed at my window holding anything @ 2 am.

30. Wanna have grandkids before you’re 50? Let's see... I was 25 when I had Camryn, so I guess technically I could be a grandparent before 50. I'm hoping she waits a little longer to have kids than I did.

31. Name something you have to do tomorrow? Not sure. Laundry is always on the list, as are dishes. So those are always a definite must-do in this house.

32. Do you think too much or too little? Too much. Always.

Little Miss Misspoken

Lillian was doing her "homework" just now (coloring a little booklet full of things that start with the letter P) and as she was coloring, she was singing:

"My God is so big

So strong and so mighty

There's nothing my God

Cannot do!

The mountains are His

The valleys are His...

The stars are his HANDIWIPES too!"

After several rounds of "THAT'S WHAT MRS. HOWARD SAID! HANDIWIPES!" I gave up and let Lillian think that God uses the stars to wipe His hands.

I guess He can. After all, He *is* God!

Sign of Fall

I did a little Target shopping yesterday. By myself. That was a treat by itself.

Then I stumbled across these little treasures and grabbed them quickly.

I love this stuff. Sugary goodness that is a sure sign that fall will soon be knocking on my door.

I cut the bag open this morning and ate a couple of handfuls. I love the pumpkins the most, but the chocolate flavored candy corns are delicious, too.

It may still be 80 degrees outside, but in my mind it's a crisp fall day.

Brach's Autumn Mix: one of the many things that make me smile.

Manic Monday 8/31/2009

Are you usually late, early or right on time?

I like to be a little bit early. I'm hardly ever late. I think it's rude to be late, honestly.

What would be harder for you, to tell someone you love them or to tell them that you do not love them back?

It would be harder to tell someone I don't love them back. I don't think I've ever had to do that.

Which would you rather have: a high salary or job satisfaction?

Job satisfaction. There's no point doing a job you hate, even if it's for a ridiculous sum of money. Too much and stress resentment comes along with that.

Friday Fill-Ins 8/28/09

1. He was a size 2.5 when I took him into the shoe store yesterday. We walked out with brand new size 5.5 tennis shoes for Aiden! His poor, scrunched up toes were screaming, "Thank you!" Funny thing is, I had to drag Aiden into the store. He swore that his old sneakers were fine, but I could tell he was walking funny.

2. Being on a regular schedule and getting the children back in the routine of going to school is what I look forward to most this time of year.

3. My best friend is my husband.

4. The house is kind of too quiet with the kids gone, to be honest with you. My mom was right!

5. Appearances can be something people put too much emphasis on.

6. The last person I gave a hug to was Quinn, last night before bed. He gave me one, then came back a few minutes later for another. It was a long, "I don't want to stop hugging you" snuggle hug.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to not having to make 4 lunches! Tomorrow my plans include sleeping late, spending the day being lazy, maybe by the pool, and keeping the babies in nursery @ church! Sunday, I want to get the house tidy because community group is meeting here.

Guess What?

I'm not doing a meme today! You get an actual, true life, it happened to me story!

Dinnertime lately has been a battle. Three of my children are pretty easy going when it comes to what I cook. They'll usually try everything on the plate without much hassle. It's just the one (ahem, Camryn!) that raises her nose in the air and refuses to even consider touching food to her tongue if it's not something she LOVES to eat (chicken nuggets and pasta, anyone?)

I'm at my wit's (wits'?) end with this child. I have tried everything I know to make this a tolerable situation, short of just making her favorite meals every night (that's not really feasible, nor is it fair, really). I didn't know what else to do.

My husband finally suggested that we let Camryn be involved in the menu planning and/or cooking. No, we're not having pasta and chicken every night, but at least she can suggest things she'd like to try to make and eat. Okay. Now we're getting somewhere.

Tonight she helped me peel, slice, boil and mash the potatoes. She added the butter, salt, mayo & milk and whipped up some great mashed spuds. They were tasty.

I made fried okra. She added the flour and shook up the bag. Then I showed her how to know when to add the okra to the oil and how to turn it and brown it.

I made a grilled chicken using an Asian flavored marinade, and Camryn actually complemented it. She ate the potatoes and all of her okra. It was the nicest, most controversy-free meal we've had in a L-O-N-G time.

So as we were eating dessert, I commented on how pleasant dinner had been. I said, "No one argued, no one left the table in a huff, no one slammed a door in frustration...."

And that's when Aiden said:

"NO ONE HAD TO CALL ANIMAL CONTROL!"

And that was it. We dissolved in fit of laughter.

It's been a great day. I hope it was for you, too.

Friday Fill Ins 8/9/09

I know it's Sunday, but here is this week's Friday Fill Ins...two days late.

1. Sleeping late and not having a set schedule are my favorite summertime pasttimes.

2. My favorite John Hughes movies is Some Kind of Wonderful.

3. My kids' hair is something I love to touch. I love snuggling them on the couch, because they put their heads in my lap while we watch TV and I can run my hands through their hair until they get sick of it.

4. The full moon is so bright it lights up my kitchen at night (we have a Solatube in the ceiling).

5. I am hungry right now. We didn't eat lunch, which is typical of Sundays around here. We are headed somewhere (don't know where yet) for supper soon.

6. When daylight fades it means the house will be quiet soon.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to _____, tomorrow my plans include _____ and Sunday, I want to _____! (I'm leaving this blank 'cause it's irrelevant now.)

The Australian Judge Gives It a 9.6

As I travel along this path called Adulthood, I gain more and more insight about the reasons for the things my mother always did. Things I never understood.... until I started (gasp) becoming my own mother.

For instance, I always thought that my mom got up at an insanely crazy hour. I like my sleep, and I have always been good at sleeping. I practice a LOT. I don't like waking up early. Mom was usually up around 5:30, I think. I was always asleep, so I'm not 100% sure of her wake up time. I just knew it was really freakin' earlier than I'd ever consider being up and about. She still rises with the sun. Crazy.

For two weeks now I've had a bad cold. It's the kind of cold that keeps you awake because you're so congested you cannot breathe, whether you're reclining or sitting up. You lay in bed trying not to wake your spouse with your throttling nose blows. You drain the dregs of what was a glass of tea at midnight (but is now a flavorless puddle of tea-flavored water) in an effort to wet your dry throat and stifle your hacking cough. You finally give up trying to go back to sleep (sleep is hard when you can't breathe, no?) and seek solace in another part of the house. My solitary place is my office.

Three times this week I've been up before the sun. And you know what? I've discovered that Mom is a genius.

It's Q-U-I-E-T before the break of day. I can actually think and spend a few moments collecting myself before I'm hurled head first into the insanity of my daily life. I can imagine it's a lot like the few moments a competitive diver spends collecting him/herself before diving into the pool below. Time to concentrate (all alone) on the task before you gives you so much clarity. It's amazing.

I think I'm going to set a goal for myself for the coming school year. I am going to try to wake up at 7 am in order to give myself 30 solitary minutes to just chill before I start the day. I'll be able to greet each child with a smile instead of barking at them to get up (because I'm mad that I had to get up only 2 minutes before). I think it might just make life a little smoother and happier.

We'll see.

Thanks, Mom.