Destinations

First of all, how good is chocolate cake? Well, really, more to the point - how good is chocolate frosting? From the can? I could eat rubber tires as long as they were slathered in chocolate frosting. Help me, Rhonda.

Tonight we were coming home from having dinner out. Sometime during our conversation I told Quinn that his history lesson tomorrow is going to be about the Hagia Sophia.

(Side note: I'm so excited I can't stand it! I finished reading Elizabeth Kostova's The Historian a few weeks ago; the Hagia Sophia was mentioned several times in that book, and it has piqued my interest.)

Anyway, I was talking about how much I'd love to visit Istanbul, to visit the Hagia Sophia, to see where history happened, etc. Then the kiddos chimed in about historical places they've learned about that they'd like to travel to one day.

They mentioned -

New York City......

Washington, DC....

Rome....

Egypt....

Paris....

I was thrilled that the kids were interested enough in the history of those places that they'd want to physically visit them. I was mentally (and smugly, I admit) patting myself on the back for raising such awesome, smart kids, kids that love studying history, kids that enjoy learning.... you get the picture.

Then a voice came from the back seat of the van and popped my bubble. Lillian shouted loudly...

INDIANA!

Unfortunately she was silenced by the chorus of chuckles that came from her brothers and sister and we never got to find out why she'd choose to visit the Hoosier State.

We'll have to add that one to our list.

Sock It To Me

So yesterday I was snuggling Lillian in my bed.

And then she went wacko crazy.

And I asked her to leave my bed, because she was being way too loud and silly.

But before she left I said, "Lillian - please hand me my TV remote."

And she did.

She handed it to my left eye at about 10 mph.

And I was such a good mother and politely asked her to leave (at least that's how it happened in my memory. I actually think I yelled at her to GET OUT OF MY ROOM! but at least I didn't curse.)

And I have my first black (well, really greyish bluish) eye.

And it hurts to smile.

Sigh.

Nuts, Butts and Biscuits

Yesterday. Was. Great.

Yesterday should've been Mother's Day, because it was Hallmark perfect.

Got up, showered, dressed (in shorts that seemed looser! Thanks, Curves!) Took Quinn and Lillian to their soccer games (1 win, 1 tie, 1 loss). There was a great breeze. The sun was shining. It was just the kind of day that you expect perfection everywhere you turn.

The soccer games ended. I made it back up the big hill after soccer without getting out of breath. Awesome. Took Quinn and Lillian home to change. Told all the kiddos to get in the car. Aiden chose Cracker Barrel for brunch. I love that kid.

Blessed biscuits, Batman - we (a party of 5! On a Saturday!) were seated immediately at Cracker Barrel. Um, hello?!? This never happens. Made me wonder if they were out of eggs or.... everything.

I don't know if you've ever had the pleasure of taking 4 children to Cracker Barrel. It's not as easy as you might think. It's like negotiating world peace. I need to take Jimmy Carter with me next time I go. Really. It's breakfast, but it takes skills to make all my kids happy at the Barrel of Crackers. Because...

I have one that wants the blackberry pancakes, except she wants GRITS with that. Side order of grits added is like, $45.50 or something. Outrageous. It makes more sense to get grits with something than order them on the side, so that's where it gets tricky..

I personally have to order a breakfast with grits so that Miss Blackberry Pancakes gets her extra side of starch (add cheese for $.90, please!) 'Sokay, 'cause I'm not big on grits. I know. Shoot me.

But there are like 37 different breakfast combo plates at Cracker Barrel, and they seem to all be named after family members. Uncle Herschel, Grandpa, Momma, etc. I can't keep them all straight. So while the kids are all peppering me with questions, I'm trying to figure out which family member's breakfast I want. And it has to have grits, and enough food left on the plate so that without the grits I still feel like I've eaten something.

Then I have another kid who thinks he can eat like a 40 year-old truck driver. Breaker 1-9, breaker 1-9, he wants country fried steak with his breakfast. So I have to begin the "Do you know what deep fried red meat will do to your 9 year-old arteries, son?" song and dance. "Remember those chicken nuggets we found in the floorboard of the van that time? Like, weeks and weeks after they'd left the fryer at McDonald's? Remember that they were so hard you could throw them at passing cars and leave dents? Yeah. That's your arteries on country fried steak." He relented and ordered the turkey sausage instead. Not great, but better than the alternative. And he wants grits, too. And apples, but please no hash brown casserole. Because potatoes and cheese... that can't be good, right? (I seriously don't know how I failed him in that department, poor child.) So, I have to find a breakfast with grits and apples but no potatoes. Aunt Peggy? Is that you?

Then there are the youngest two of my brood. They each want pancakes and eggs. This is where I have issues with Cracker Barrel. On their kids' menu they offer either pancakes (no sides) OR one egg with one biscuit (no sides). What happens when you have children that want some protein with their short stack, or just want more than one single egg? You have to perform a pantomime and hope that the waitress catches on, can read lips or speak Mandarin. You see, I want to order the Momma's Pancake breakfast off of the adult menu, because it comes with 3 pancakes, 3 slices of bacon and two eggs (one scrambled, one over medium. I think that must throw the fry cook into all sorts of fits. Bipolar eggs. CAN'T SHE MAKE UP HER MIND?) When the food arrives I give 1.5 pancakes and 1.5 slices of bacon and one scrambled egg to one child, then put one over medium egg on the other plate with the leftover pancakes and bacon. And I have to do it FAST while the kids are distracted by that golf tee game, because heaven forbid they think they're actually SHARING a MEAL. They CANNOT hear me say to the waitress, "These two are going to SPLIT THAT." No dice, man. They have to believe that they each ordered and received things that were prepared separately and just for them. Teeny tiny breakfast narcissists.

(Scrolling back up now to see where I was actually going with this post. I got wrapped up in Breakfast Negotiations 2010.)

Anyhow, I say all that to tell you that breakfast ordering, and in fact, consumption, went very peacefully yesterday morning. Like, almost too peacefully. Like, I expected Keanu was tampering with the Matrix or something. It was that good.

And when kids are good, don't we feel all proud and happy? And don't they just know that when they are well behaved we're going to be more likely to say, "Yes, you can waste $5 on a cheap toy because I love you so much and you're so perfect and you ate all your pancakes? Please let me buy you a very loud clicky toy or a hatching dinosaur egg that I will most likely throw away in 6 weeks?"

So that is where I'm going with this.

Quinn chose a hatching dinosaur egg. In the car on the way home he pretended to be the momma dinosaur sitting on the egg. He'd put it between his legs, squawk like a pterodactyl and then move his legs so we could see his egg. Well, I couldn't see it, because I was driving. Which reminds me of a pet peeve of mine: TV show characters that turn toward their passenger and look at them for 5 minutes at a time when they're supposed to be looking AT THE ROAD.

But I digress.

Back to the momma bird.

Quinn said, "You know where penguins keep their eggs?"

(No, I cannot believe I'm going to type his answer here, but I am. Because it's funny. And you'll crack up. Get it? CRACK UP? Like the egg?)

Quinn says, "Between their NUTS and their BUTTS!"

Oh, my. I tried to set him straight, but that led to questions whose answers I was ill prepared for. I bungled the whole thing, and now my 7 year-old thinks pregnant women and animals carrying eggs can't go poop or pee while they're swollen with child.

It doesn't end there, though.

Last night on the way to church I recounted the whole conversation to my husband. And we had to rehash the whole anatomy discussion, and somehow the following phrase came out of Lillian's mouth:

"Girls don't have round nuts. We have flat nuts."

And that, my friends, was Saturday.

100 Days

My baby girl has been in kindergarten for 100 days as of Tuesday (it would've been Monday, but the snow forced us to miss a day of school.)

Here is the book she made as part of the 100 day celebration her class had.

Yes, folks. That's 100 SERVANTS. As if the one she already has (me) wasn't enough. She needs 99 more, I guess.

Smart kid I have there. I couldn't do 100 spiders, either. Our life isn't an episode of Fear Factor, after all.


You'd get a nasty bellyache, but yeah... 100 cupcakes is a dream.



Not if you ate 100 cupcakes, honey. You couldn't lift 100 of yourself (well, maybe if each one of you only had 1 cupcake each).



Spiders and bugs? You'd think we need an exterminator. Maybe she was sitting with boys when she filled this out. I swear our house is clean, y'all.



Make those tents, dear. (See "100 cupcakes")

On a funny note, I told Lillian that dresses was spelled with an -es at the end and she begged to differ. "It's 'DRES' 'S', Mommy!" as she pronounced the "s" as "-es". Something tells me that the K5 kids haven't discussed suffixes and plurals yet.

So, 100 days... that means only 80 more, right?!?

YAHOO!

Post Holiday Humor

We just got back from Target.

My wonderful sister bought each of my children a $25 Target gift card as their holiday gift. Camryn spent hers 2 days after Christmas. In an effort to avoid another day of the "I've-been-in-my-pajamas-too-long-doing-nothing-and-the-Christmas-decorations-are-already-put-away-and-we-had-our-14 year old-cat-put-to-sleep-and-that-makes-me-sad" blues, I decided to take the kids to Target to spend their gift cards.

Yeah.

Despite some drama over a lost gift card (Quinn), we made it to Target and the toy choice process was relatively easy. Aiden immediately gravitated towards the Nintendo DS games. Quinn chose 2 large Hot Wheels toys (a fire truck and a tractor trailer) and a large race car. Lillian picked out a Little Mermaid doll, some dress up shoes and a tricked out Paris Hilton style Tini Puppini "mini dog" named Tisha (Aiden says she looks like a girl with a dog head and a mustache).

So here's the scene: Lillian has donned her plastic dress-up shoes and a shiny green beaded necklace and she's lovingly brushing Tisha's mane of hair. Quinn has his fire truck in the den, putting out pretend blazes.

Suddenly, without warning, Lillian stops brushing Tisha's hair and shouts, "Quinn! Quinn! Come quick! Tisha's tail is ON FIRE! QUINN! HURRY! HURRY!"

Calmly, Quinn responds, "Sorry, Lillo. I only put out fires in buildings. I don't do dogs."

Poor, poor Tisha.

Oops, I Did It Again

Funny story.

Yesterday was clean up day. The lady who cleans our house is coming today, and I always feel compelled to tidy before she gets here. Go figure.

Camryn's job yesterday was to move all of the gifts under the big tree in the front of the house, vacuum up all the faux pine needles that have fallen off of it due to excess climbage by the cats, then replace the gifts and rewrap the two whose paper has been shredded by the aforementioned cats.

K.

Camryn got to work without complaint (a true Christmas miracle) and then I heard screaming, wailing and yes, I think I even heard gnashing of teeth (my own, it turns out...)

The vacuum noise stopped. The crying (Lillian's) started and it grew louder as the girls approached me.

Lillian thrust this into my face:

It seems that the cats had snagged Angel off the kids' tree and had their way with her, and then Camryn had accidentally vacuumed up the right side of her hair.

Lillian was distraught.

Camryn was laughing (I have to admit it was pretty funny...)

"She looks like Britney Spears when she shaved her head!"

I couldn't help laughing. Lillian didn't think our laughter was funny.

I assured Lillian that we could replace the sweet angel's hair with just a little bit of craftiness.

Britney Spears.

Crack me up.

And the hits keep on coming...

Lillian's on a comedic roll lately.

Last night at dinner she said, "Hola, Daddy! I want you to sit by me! Do you know what I just said to you, Daddy? I said, 'Hello, Daddy! I want you to sit by me!'"

Yesterday afternoon she was singing a song called "Mighty to Save". We sing it in church. The lyrics go:

Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.

Lillian's version?

Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty insane,
He is Mighty insane..

Little Miss Misspoken

Lillian was doing her "homework" just now (coloring a little booklet full of things that start with the letter P) and as she was coloring, she was singing:

"My God is so big

So strong and so mighty

There's nothing my God

Cannot do!

The mountains are His

The valleys are His...

The stars are his HANDIWIPES too!"

After several rounds of "THAT'S WHAT MRS. HOWARD SAID! HANDIWIPES!" I gave up and let Lillian think that God uses the stars to wipe His hands.

I guess He can. After all, He *is* God!

My husband is currently at Lowe's buying something he needs for a project. He took Lillian with him. Bless his heart.

Lillian is, for lack of a better word, LOUD. She loves to sing and talk and giggle, which is all well and good, but she doesn't know when to stop. She often makes me wish kids were born with an off switch.

Hubby just called asking for a measurement for a shelf he needs to hang. I could hear Lillian in the background, and thus I could barely hear hubby. She's that LOUD.

I asked, "What's Lillian saying?"

"She's singing, 'Oh, it's what you do to me' over and over and OVER into a 4" pipe."

If you are familiar with top 40 radio, then you know that's the Plain White T's song, "Hey There Delilah." We're fans of the song, but she hasn't picked it up from the radio or my iPod or anything like that.

You know where she's gotten that lyric?

Stupid Kidz Bop CDs that McDonald's is currently giving away in their Happy Meals.

I HATE KIDZ BOP. I've never, ever purchased one in the store. I'm not a big fan of kiddie choral music, and the Kidz Bop songs creep me out. Who thought that up, and who buys them? Really? Are the original versions of the songs just too palatable to your ears? You like to be tortured on a daily basis? That's what that Kidz Bop stuff does to me. Blood. Pouring out of my ears. It's AWFUL. As soon as the kids aren't looking, I throw them in the trash.

Lillian, however, has salvaged one and put it into the CD player/radio that's in her room. Evidently it's on repeat, 'cause she knows the lyrics to "Hey There Delilah" as if she was a Plain White T herself.

Did I mention that I HATE KIDZ BOP CDs?

"Ooooohhhhh.... it's what you do to me-eee-eee..."

Poor hubby.

Missing Music, Strawberry Sausage, Thursday Thunks

I had some iTunes issues this morning. I couldn't get iTunes to recognize my iPod, so I closed iTunes and then when I tried to reopen it it wouldn't come back up. A few reboots, a little tinkering with Task Manager and some Googling solved the problem, but MAN. I was stuck! When I sit down in the office to start whatever project is on the agenda for the day, I have to have the music on. I recently redeemed my SwagBucks for a $15 iTunes gift certificate, so I downloaded a bunch of songs yesterday (not telling how many, but enough to make several mix tapes if I were still using cassettes...my iTunes cart kept getting fuller and fuller and fuller...) Anyhoo, I wanted to play what I downloaded and doggone it, iTunes just would.not.cooperate. It's fixed now. Thank goodness. All is right in my world again.

Hubby shared a Lillian funny with us last night. Driving home in the truck, he heard Lillian say, "I'm gonna pooooot!" Then shortly after that, "Here it comes!!!!" and then, in an "I'm so pleased with myself for creating such loveliness" voice, she said "Ahhhhhh..... it smells like strawberry sausage!"

That girl cracks me up. She's such a comedienne.

And now onto the Meme of the day, Thursday Thunks.

1. You are walking down the road and you look down. There is a bug. Do you step on it?

No. I'm walking away from it, so it can't bother me. I'd rather let it return to its little bug family.

2. What is one fantasy that you want to come true more than any other?

I don't have fantasies. I would like a hot tub, but that's not really a fantasy. I don't daydream about wanting one.

3. Someone knocks on your door. Do you look out the window to see who it is before you open it? Do you open it regardless of who it is?

Yes, I always look. We have a peephole on our front door (we had one at our last house because we lived on a busy road and got a lot of strangers at the door...) I don't open it if it's someone I don't know or someone I'm not expecting.

4. Have you ever eaten Play Doh?

No. I enjoy its fragrance, but it's not something I want to ingest.

5. What was your favorite Saturday morning cartoon as a child and why?

Scooby Doo. I like mysteries, and that van was just a cool ride, man. The Mystery Machine. I think I should get my van painted like that. It would really embarrass the kiddos.

6. Are you a "people watcher"?

Yes. I love watching people and traffic.

7. I have a bowl of fruit. There are apples, oranges & pears. You help yourself to one - which one do you choose?

Pears. I like oranges, but they're a lot of trouble. I like apples, but I prefer them peeled. Pears are great just like they are, though.

8. What is your biggest pet peeve in the blogging world?

Not sure I have one.

9. What is one religion that you could just never see yourself joining?

Scientology.

10. What word do you use far too often?

Actually or totally. So guilty of overusing those words, and now Lillian uses ACTUALLY all the time because she's heard it so much.

11. How long do you spend in the shower?

Less than 10 minutes. I take much shorter showers than my husband does.

12. If you were to write a personal ad about yourself, what would it say?

I can't even begin to formulate a personal ad in my head. I'd have to think longer on that one.

13. Your favorite flavor of soup is....?

Campbell's Bean with Bacon or anyone's Crab Bisque (not from a can, though). I love a good French Onion soup, too.

14. You are sitting on a bench in the park and a bug walks in front of your feet.... do you squash him?

If it's an ant, maybe. I don't want him to sting me.

I had a dream....

I hate when I am asleep and dreaming about having to go to the potty.

Right before I woke up this morning I was having such a dream. It's so bizarre I just had to share.

I was in a parking garage with Ashton Kutcher and actress/comedienne Mo'Nique (I know, right? Like those two would ever hang out. Maybe they're planning a remake of The Graduate together or something. Who knows.)

So we're all about to hop in a super tiny car. Me, Mo'Nique and Ashton. I called shotgun (wouldn't you?)

Right before I opened the car door I realized I needed to use the facilities, so after announcing that to Ash and Mo, I promptly sat down on the floor of the parking garage.

Fast forward to the next scene in my dream and I'm crossing the street from the garage to a row of buildings. Ashton and Mo'Nique are sitting at an outdoor cafe' table (probably discussing the Graduate script...) when I approach. I see a caption (YES, a CAPTION!) underneath where they're sitting that says, "2 Hours Later" like I'm in an episode of Spongebob or something.

"Hey!" I say. "Are y'all still waiting on me to go to the bathroom?"

"DUH." Ashton replies.

"Sorry. I didn't know what the plan was!" I retort.

So then I open the door to a bank and go inside. I walk all the way to the back and ask if they have a bathroom I can use.

The manager says, "We don't do that sort of thing here."

So I squat down on the floor in front of the horrified customers inside the bank and say, "Well, I guess I'll just go right here, then!"

Voila. Keys appear and I'm allowed inside a room straight out of a spy movie. It's all hush-hush and whatnot. Buttons are pushed and a hole opens up on a countertop.

Evidently, it's a top secret potty project. I'm instructed to hop up onto the countertop and try out the new high-tech, appear out of nowhere toilet. As I start to relieve myself in my dream, I awaken.

I hate when that happens.

As I was sharing the dream with my husband, he relayed a story about Lillian from last night (we took Aiden out to Quaker Steak for a 2nd birthday dinner, because he loves All-You-Can-Eat wings on Tuesday nights...)

Stan took the kids (minus Aiden) to the car while I finished paying the bill. There was an overcharge on the bill, so they waited longer than they expected to. Naturally, Lillian announced that she had to go potty. Thinking I would be right out, Stan told Lillian to get out and wait for me in front of the van so I could turn around and take her back to the potty when I came outside. She got out and started pacing back and forth in front of the car, moaning and groaning about how badly she had to goooooooooo.... I'm sure you can picture the scene.

Stan said she finally stopped and said, "Daddy! Can't I just squat right here in front of the van on the sidewalk?"

Bless her heart. She is so envious of her brothers that can go pee (practically) anywhere, anytime.

And that concludes today's session of "Potty Talk with Beth". Tune in tomorrow when we broach the topic, "Toilet Paper: Over or Under?!?"

Daily Giggle

Usually on the drive home from dropping the kids off at school I'm mentally planning the rest of my day. Lillian sometimes chats with me, but it takes me a minute to realize what she's said to me because I'm making a to-do list in my head.

Today she said, "I don't know what she knows! Do you, Mommy?"

Took me a second to realize what she was talking about.

Said the shepard boy to the mighty king
Do you know what I know
(Do You Know What I Know)
In your palace wall mighty king
Do you know what I know
(Do You Know What I Know)
A child, a child
Shivers in the cold
Let us bring him silver and gold

That song was playing on the radio and Lillian was paying attention to the lyrics.

Evidently Lillian does not know what the singer knows.

Crack me UP.

Um, okay... retraining needed!

This was how the conversation went with Lillian in the car this morning:

L: Mommy, when is the next holiday when we get candy?
Me: Um, not sure, Lillo.
L: Oh! I know! It's EASTER! The Easter bunny will bring us candeeeeeee!
Me: Lillian, do you know why we celebrate Easter?
L: Because of the Easter bunny.
Me: Well, not exactly. Do you know who died on the cross and then was buried in a tomb and rose again on Easter?
L: The Easter Bunny!
Me: No. Who was born at Christmastime?
L: Santa Claus.
Me: No. What BABY was born at Christmas?
L: Baby JESUS!
Me: Right. And he grew up and died on the cross to save us from our sins, right? And he rose out of his tomb on the third day and that's why we celebrate Easter.
L: Oh. Will the Easter bunny still bring me candy?
Me: Sure.
L: Tell him I like jellybeans.

Overheard: 5 seconds of my life

From the den about 30 seconds ago:

Aiden: It's wrestling, not boxing!

(Grunts and groans)

Quinn: Stop it! You're no match for me!

Lillian: Aiden! Your wrestling name is Big Foot.

Aiden: NO! I'm the Stopper.

Just a little Living Room theater for you this evening. Enjoy.

I Am Thankful For...

This is what Lillian's 3 year-old preschool class had to say about what they're thankful for this year. Priceless.

Talley: hayrides, Mr. Mark, chocolate

Madison: butter (amen, sister!), Abbie, pretzels, cookies, Daddy and Momma (wonder how Momma feels about being one-upped by butter?!?!)

Nelson: Nana's cat Bob, my puppet show, Haley (she's in Heaven), my house, my dragon, my bathtub and lions (What, no butter?)

Caleb: Chocolate (Lillian needs to marry this boy. He knows a good thing when he sees it! Well, maybe not... if he's thankful for MILK chocolate, someone else can have him.)

Kaplan: Scout, my pup, my Momma, Daddy, my best brothers

Ben: leaves, pretzels too, a house, my bed

Samuel: my sister, Mommy and my Daddy

Ava: Daddy, my Mommy too, monkeys (someone's recently visited the zoo, I guess...)

Anna: my Mommy and Daddy, Luke and Sara

And then there's Lillian. I had to laugh.

Lillian: Annabelle (our cat), Oliver (another cat), Beeson (yet another feline), Quinn, Daddy, Mommy (oh, there I am!), cookies (whew, I made it in just before cookies!), Nana, Camryn, Aiden, scarecrows, rainbows. And toys. (Something tells me she was looking around the classroom to come up with scarecrows and rainbows. Hey, isn't that in that Julie Andrews song? "Raindrops on rainbows and fresh apple scarecrows? These are a few of my favorite things"? Isn't that how it goes?!?)

Along those same lines, I need to catch up with a blog challenge that my friend Sherry issued at the beginning of November. I'm only 3 weeks behind, but better late than never, eh? (That EH is a shout out to my Canadian friends Cyn and Lee!)

So, here's my list. Twenty-two things for which I am grateful. In no particular order.

(1) A warm garage. I'd hate to have to warm up the car and scrape ice in the mornings. More sleep for me!

(2) These socks I got from Bath & Body Works. They have no-slip circles on the bottom and they're super soft. I have red, pink and green. Toasty tootsies!

(3) Bath bombs from Basin. I stock up every time we go to Disney World, but you can order them online.

(4) My iPod. Greatest invention EVAH.

(5) My husband (I did say these were in no particular order... he and the kids would be at the top, of course!) I have a hardworking, big hearted, slow to anger, patient, loving husband that spoils me rotten. He's too good to me.

(6) My children. They play well together, they don't need me to entertain them constantly, they are good about getting homework done, they appreciate me and compliment and edify me every day. They are angels on earth and I know God sent them to me for a reason. They totally ROCK.

(7) My parents. They're always willing to keep the kids for us, and they don't just babysit. They engage the kids in activities and take them places. They truly enjoy being with the kids, not just simply having the kids in their presence. They were awesome parents, but they're even better grandparents. They raised me to be who I am and I am so grateful for their guidance, their praise, their leadership, their friendship and their love. They totally ROCK, too!

(8) This blog. I'm glad I started blogging. I do it for me (it helps when it's time to add a story to a scrapbook page!), but it's nice that y'all are along for the ride, too.

(9) Friends, both "real life" ones and Internet ones. I don't interact with either often enough, but just knowing they're there and will be there when I need them is a huge comfort.

(10) Our new church. We started going to a non-denominational church this summer, and I've experienced such spiritual growth since then. I'm grateful we found it and started attending. It's been an oasis in the middle of a huge desert.

(11) The kids' schools and their teachers. Every person that teaches one of my children truly has the kids' best interest at heart. Each one of these men and women actually seeks to know my children almost as well as I do. They love and teach my kids in my absence, and I'm so thankful for each one of them, their influence in my childrens' lives and the way they're molding and shaping my children to be good learners, full of wisdom about things of this earth and Heavenly matters.

(12) My husband's job. He's busier than ever, which, in this economy, is a wonder.

(13) Dave Ramsey. This man and his desire to help people get out of debt have changed our lives for the better. If all goes according to plan, we'll be completely debt free (house and all!) in just a little over 4 years. I'm giddy thinking about all the people we can help with the income we've been blessed with. Can't wait to pay that final mortgage payment! (If you're interested, you can buy Dave's Total Money Makeover book right now for $10. That's an awesome deal!)

(14) Scrapbooking. I love this "hobby". I have a passion for it. It feeds the need I have to be creative while letting me share my heart on paper. I hope my children cherish these books for the rest of their lives.

(15) To Do Lists. I make them every day and they really keep me motivated. Today's list: clean out the cups & glasses in the kitchen cabinet, clean out the upper snack pantry cabinet, bag clothes to go to Goodwill, laundry (always laundry!) and dishes (always dishes!)

(16) Books. I love books. I love the escape they provide.

(17) Movies. (See books!)

(18) A comfy bed. We have had a Tempurpedic for about 4 years, and I can honestly say I've never slept better. It was worth every last penny.

(19) Starbucks hot chocolate. I'm not a coffee drinker, so I didn't ever see the need to try anything at Starbucks. But I've been treating my daughter's 5th grade teacher to her favorite Starbucks coffees this year, and I've discovered their (sinfully delicious and outrageously expensive) hazelnut hot chocolate. It's heaven in a cup.

(20) My sister's friends. My sister has been going through some rough stuff lately, and I haven't been able to comfort her. Knowing she has great friends around her right now has eased my worry, so I'm thankful for Val and Holly and Trey and all the angels that have rallied around my sweet sister to help heal her broken heart.

(21) Massages. It's not that often that I get one, but when I do get one I feel awesome for days. I need to schedule a monthly rub down, but life is Busy with a capital B and my shoulders feel it!

(22) The $4 car wash place. I love that place. They do a fantastic job getting the Monorail clean, plus they offer FREE vacuuming! I love a clean car, and I love that I can get the van all sparkly for just $4!

She's On a Roll....

Know what that is?

A roll from Ryan's restaurant, you say?

Well, that would be the obvious choice.

But you're wrong. Dead wrong.

To find out what that *really* is you need to ask a 4 year-old.

Let's do that. Let's do that right now.

Here's a 4 year-old. Let's ask her.



"Lillian, what is that in the picture above?"

"Hmmm..... (giggle, giggle, snicker, laugh, snort).... hmmmm.... mmmm... (snicker, snort)..."

"It's a (snicker, snicker, giggle) it's a.... (giggle, laugh, snicker...) it's a....

BOOTIE BUN!"

"Ah, of course. How could I NOT have seen that?!?"

CRACK me up.

(Get it? CRACK?!?!? Bwa ha ha ha ha! Where *DID* she get her sense of humor?!?)

My Lillian

I've been saving these two videos of Lillian. I figured I'd put them on the blog one day, so since I'm low on blog fodder today, you get to watch two very adorable videos of my youngest. She's like the sun with a clown hat on it. Love this kid.

This one was taken in the spring. She goes through spurts where she adopts a catchphrase or discovers that she can make a certain noise and then uses it ad nauseum. Charming. Below are two examples of her performing her schtick for the camera.

"Dude, You're AWESOME!"

(She also tries to remember a story she had told me at bedtime the night before about the family she used to live with before she moved in with us. Dad was Nosepicker, mom was Sharkrollers and her siblings were John and Sarah. They were awfully mean to her, so she came to live with us. She was half asleep when she told the story. She came directly from my womb, so I have no idea from where this story originates.)



and

"Break it down now, break it down now
Putcha putcha putcha ouuuuuut.
WORD."



ENJOY. I sure do. Every day.

As if...

...today wasn't already busy enough...

Lillian and Camryn came into the house with the mail about half an hour ago. I was on the phone with a friend that I haven't talked to in awhile, so I didn't look at the mail until I hung up the phone. I saw a birthday party invitation for Lillian, so I opened it. The party is TODAY. It's currently 11:19 am and the party starts at NOON. The invitation wasn't addressed (just her name was on it) so I assume the neighbor just stuck it in the box late yesterday or early this morning. Good thing the girls checked the box, and that I keep "emergency" gifts on hand. Lillo's upstairs in the playroom picking out a princess dress to wear, and I called the parents to see if it's okay that Camryn chaperones Lillian to the party. I have a crazy lot of stuff to do today, so a party wasn't on my agenda. Usually I get a week or so notice for parties, but I've never gotten a couple of hours notice. Who does that?

Today

Today my name is Rancho Grande, and Lillian wishes to be called Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich. I asked if I can just call her PB&J, and she nixed that idea. I must use the entire name when addressing her.

So my weekend went like this: take care of the sick hubby all day Saturday, leave for a brief trip to Target to buy supplies for Lillian's party, eat a bowl of spicy chili for dinner, wake up at 4:45 on Sunday morning and say hello again to that bowl of spicy chili. Fun.

So hubby and Camryn were in charge of Lillian's birthday party. I was confined to the bed. Hubby enlisted our children to clean the den, back porch, downstairs patio and playground area. Camryn baked the cupcakes and iced them. She planned the games, tried to play them with our young guests ("like herding cats" the hubby said) and took the pictures at the party. Camryn and her dad made an excellent team, and the party went very well (I watched the video). I'm so very grateful that I have such a wonderful husband. Most men would've cancelled the party, but my amazing guy trudged ahead. He even made me fruit salad and went out to Jersey Mike's to get me a sub when I felt like eating again last night. Whatta guy.

Feeling much better today. Surprisingly the house is pretty clean. Hubby finished washing all the sheets that I had in the laundry room, and the dishes in the dishwasher are clean. The den doesn't look like a tornado hit it (like I was expecting). He is a great guy. I can't complain.

I'm looking forward to a great week. Hubby is off from work tomorrow, which always makes for a good (relaxing) day. I think we'll go to Lowe's and get some planters and fall flora for the front porch. I get to go to the pumpkin patch with Aiden's class on Wednesday (and again next week with Quinn's class). Camryn and Aiden have just a half day of school on Friday, so I get to have a Mommy date with them before picking up Quinn & Lillian from school. I love Mommy dates.

Right now I'm concentrating on cleaning off my desk so I can get back to scrapbooking. I finished my Disney album (yea!) and need to get back to work on the kids' albums. I have piles of things on my desk, though, so those need to be purged and organized before I can concentrate on fun things. I can't be creative in the midst of chaos.

And that's all I have to say on this Monday. I hope you have a great week!

Day 3

Now entering day 3 of the stomach siege, but Lillian seems to be feeling better... she ate half a waffle and drank half a (single) bottle of apple Pedialyte before passing out in the middle of a Dora episode.

The bad news is that the hubs has it now. He's home from work today. He looks just like Lillian does, except he's laying in our bed asleep in front of HGTV.

I've been to CVS so many times in the past few days I think they might give me my own personal parking spot. I'm praying no one else gets this (and by no one else, you know I selfishly mean ME, right?)