Top Ten Things I Would Not Miss (#2 in a series)

The last blog was Top Ten Things I Would Miss if They Were Gone.

So it seems fitting that this one should be titled:

"Top Ten Things I Would NOT Miss if They Were Gone/Fell Off the Face of the Earth/Went Into Rehab and Never Came Back"

I forgot to say in my previous Top Ten blog that these are in no particular order. Number one is no more important than number ten. They're just ordered that way because that's the way they came to me.

(1) Polly Pockets

Moms of daughters, stand with me on this one. Let's rid the world of these little rubber menaces with their shoes no bigger than boogers. I hate these things. My older daughter knows that she will not be allowed to bring any more Polly Pocket dolls, accessories, body parts, teeny tiny wigs, etc. into this home. If she receives any as gifts, they are to remain unopened until we can have them sprinkled with holy water and returned to the nearest Target store.

(2) The Rebel Flag

There are so many things I could say about this, but I won't bore you. Yes, it has a place in history, but it has been abused by hate groups and therefore should not be flown publicly anywhere by any government entity. And that's all I have to say about that.

(3) High heeled shoes

I know some gals like the heels, but they're just darned uncomfortable. Give me my butt ugly but oh so comfy Crocs any day. They're not fashionable, but my back doesn't hurt when I wear them, so I know they work. I wish I could wear them to church without people looking at me cross-eyed.

(4) Valentine's Day

I know my husband loves me, so there really is no need for him to go spend an arm and two legs on Valentine crap. I'd actually be mad if he freed captive flowers by paying the ransom florists want for them on Valentine's Day. So why did I get all in a wad when I didn't get so much as a CARD on February 14th? I dunno. But I was convinced it meant something and I stayed mad for about 4 days or so afterwards, rubbing it in whenever I could. I got him and the kids card each, plus candy (for the kids) and Peeps hearts for my hubby (he loves those Peep things! Ick!) But I got squat. I hate Valentine's Day.

(5) Marilyn Manson

Personally I have never, ever listened to a Marilyn Manson song, but I imagine that it would sound much like chewing on tin foil feels. I can't get past his eyes. They creep me out, dude. If I see his picture in People magazine, I have to cover it with my hand. I can't even bring myself to touch the paper, so I just let my hand hover over the picture so he's not staring at me while I read. I'm afraid his evilness is going to burn my oh-so-innocent skin, so his photograph cannot be touched.

Did I mention he creeps me OUT?

(6) Telephones

I know. It's a bold statement. But I would not miss telephones if they went away. Give me an instant messaging system, some email and a microphone that works through my computer and I'm good.

I hate answering the phone. It always rings when I am the least likely to want to chat. I love caller ID and use it. Yep, I screen. I'm a screener. Love it, use it, will never get rid of it. Mine comes through my satellite TV so I don't even have to get up to check the phone if'n I don't wanna.

(7) Telemarketing

See number 6 for an explanation.

(8) Snow

Yes, it is pretty. I will admit that. But I'm not a person who likes cold weather OR grey days. When it snows, the skies are grey and I get sad and icky. I'm not a winter person.

(9) Judgment

No, I don't mean like the final judgment that is discussed in Revelation. I'm talking about judgment of others. Can't we just all get along? All that "I'd like to buy the world a Coke" and live in perfect harmony stuff? Why do we feel the need to pass judgment on others?

I admit, I'm guilty, and the view from up here is mighty nice, but I hate when someone with an ivory tower higher than mine passes judgment on me. Wow. That hurts. And it reminds me that I do it, too.

I have a love/hate relationship with judgment, so if one day it just disappeared, that would be great. No more worries.

(10) Money

I wish we could all just use the barter system. Money is so overrated.